Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
