i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Randomize
