Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
