you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
