belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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