What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
