I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
