A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
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