I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize