Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
