I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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