Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize