i just google imaged poop.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize