Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize