She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
