good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
