so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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