you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Randomize
