i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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