Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
We have started to decorate penises.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
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