I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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