I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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