Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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