I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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