butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
