I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Randomize
