No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
