yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
