He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
