I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
