It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
