this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
