she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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