you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
