I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
