Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
