we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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