he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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