what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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