I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
