I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
