That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
My vagina just recognized that song.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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