The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
