Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Randomize
