I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
tell me about the eggs
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