we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
