Is it because I queefed?
do herpes really smell.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
