Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
