I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
