Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
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