she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
